100WC: Action-packed narrative

4/2/2014

The prompt this week is:

… but all we could see was water…

Please make sure you use the prompt as it is written. This means you have 107 words to use.

Tip: Type it in Word so you can edit it and check the word count!

Click here for examples from this week - hopefully you'll leave a 2 stars and a wish comment to support other writers.

Good examples (which are edited and around 107 words) will be entered for the 100 Word Challenge!

11 Comments

Adam

6/2/2014 07:49:11 am

here is my 100 word challenge Mr Temple.

The Hunger Games
It was a dark night in the Hunger Games. My hair was flapping about and I was so cold. I wonder if Peeta is alright. I heard jabber jay’s whistle a song to everyone I the arena. Eventually, the sun rose and I set out to go and hunt for food and PEAPLE. I heard people talking I wondered if it was Peeta. I went round the corner to check it was Peeta! I couldn’t believe it “, Peeta” I shouted while letting my hair fly. We met up and set off trekking. We heard voices round a corner. But all we could see was water…

logan

7/2/2014 01:39:33 pm

hi Adam good 100 word challenge well done
I have watched the hunger games so I know which bit it is
a few errors you have made
Peeta is not spelt Peeta it is spelt Peter.
another thing Adam
please make sure on a computer if a word has red lines underneath it means a word is spelt wrong so please check through your work and change the incorrect spellings
apart from that a good 100 word challenge

Mr Temple

9/2/2014 02:54:51 pm

Great work Adam. Well done on adding one of your LTT openers (Eventually, with a comma). What about a couple more: After a while, Later, ....

Cailen

7/2/2014 07:37:12 am

It was a cold and frosty night and as the water rose the house got colder. Eventually, my square black timer beeped and that was how I wake my self up. As I staggered down my cob web- invested stairs my dog yapped. Feeling melancholic, I looked out the old and dilapdated window. Walking into the tatted kithen all the cupboards were enmpty and full of very old dust. Realising I had arachnophpobia a spider wriggled up my dirty sleeve. Slowly, I walked into the blanket covered sitroom.Later on me and my friend went in a blimp and but all we could see was water.

Caitlin

8/2/2014 01:03:50 am

Well done Cailen!
That story was really good. I like your use of ly openers and adjectives.
The end sentence you could of used a exumation mark instead of a full stop.
But well done!

Mr Temple

9/2/2014 02:56:35 pm

Excellent writing, Cailen! You have used lots of Ed Ing Ly openers. To make it even better, if you had arachnophobia (great word!) I would expect a little more description of your reaction.

micah

7/2/2014 07:38:19 am

it was a gloomy night and there lived a boy called edward he loved to disovering think before everyone else the next morning edward he set on aquest to discover something new that no one ever has seen that his name would be on the tv as the greatest discovering man in the world. he called his private jet to come and get him 2 hours later when they had landed i looked around but all was water ...

Caitlin

8/2/2014 01:06:53 am

Well done Micah.
You could of put a capital letter at the start of your 100wc.
You should have a lot more full stops.
You should of used capital letters.
But well done.

Mr Temple

9/2/2014 02:58:05 pm

Some good ideas about an adventurer/explorer. However, to make it better, you need capitals and full stops.

Rose

9/2/2014 04:56:59 am

Frozen

Frozen with fear, as I saw the blue ocean surround my ankles. The infested water was getting deeper and deeper as my family relaxed on the beach. We were preparing to go scumber diving. Sprinting to the shore to reach my family the tide began to go out. Gazing into the distance, I was stars truck to see no water .Rapidly, the salty sea water started to come back! Whooshing in I began to think that I had no chance of surviving. Hearing my mother calling my name I realised this might be the last time that I hear her voice.Glancing around, all we could see was water...

Mr Temple

9/2/2014 02:59:44 pm

What a scary scene - you struggling in the water, whilst your family relax. Great -Ing openers and a dramatic first line!

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