As we flew higher and higher, my stomach started to turn and nothing could stop it. When we appeared to be at the top I looked down and I was surprised to see a circus! I looked at the balloon flyer and said "Do you see many strange things when your up here?" He nodded and looked back out to the sky. I saw phenomenal views from the balloon such as hills gleaming at me telling me to run around them like I was a child again. I hadn't noticed this yet but the fire above me seemed to be glowing more than usual. Do you think that's normal? (108 words)
I really like your 100wc Alyssa! It's full of great adjectives and a good range of punctuation. It has a great opening sentence and leaves me wanting to know how your journey ends.
Don't forget the comma in your when sentence.
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Alyssa
16/10/2013 04:13:22 am
When we appeared to be at the top, I looked down and I was surprised to see a circus!
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Aidan
16/10/2013 04:19:03 am
Great work I love it so much there's nothing I could change.
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Nieve ST. Mary's primary
13/3/2014 09:55:15 am
Alyssa that is awesome I love it and just like Aidan (I think it is) said I couldn't change a thing xxx
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We are Year 6 at Tanfield Lea Community Primary School, a primary school in County Durham who want to broaden our horizons and to show the world what we have to offer. We are using this blog to explore web design, write creatively and as a wider audience for the class' talents!
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Our topic for the Autumn term is the Normans, looking at the architecture, sources and impact of the Norman Conquest of Britain.